Planet of the Goddamn Monkeys

3 November, 2004 at 7:06 am (body politic)

My reaction to the election:

Join the NRA and prevent those damn, dirty apes from taking over the White Hous... oh, whoops.

“YOU MANIACS! YOU BLEW IT UP! DAMN YOU! GOD DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!”

Also, in accordance with the predictions of John Titor, I am going to start buckling down and preparing for the great Separatist Civil War of next year. Liberals in the Northeast who wish to separate to form their own union should start taking advantage of the recent assault rifle law lapse and stock up on munitions. The God-Botherers in the Heartland are all better-armed than we, and we therefore need to made sure that the Minutemen are ready for 2005.

I’m only half-kidding at the moment. In a week or so, I’ll be all-kidding, but until then I am going to brainstorm some ideas of logos for a Liberal revolutionary resistance, indicative of our regional propensity to transition from silversmith to outraged idealist at a moment’s notice.  Hopefully by the time I’ve finished those, the adrenaline will have worked its way out of my system, to be replaced with resignium, the chemical enzyme that allows one to hunker down and acknowledge that wishful thinking doesn’t affect the status quo.

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